Be careful what you wish for…

I get into my car yesterday morning with Mr S and he looks up at the front of our house to the bedroom and says…

The next thing we’re buying is a new window…

Now maybe what he should have said was…

The next thing we’re buying is a new BEDROOM window…

As only a few short hours later, I hear a massive BLAM!!! from the garden…

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FANTASTIC!!! A bloody great hole in my bathroom window… And now a bloody great hole in my budget as I see a few things I’d been saving for go out of the window…

I find an enormous spud down on the ground… it’s Summer holidays so I put it down to bored kids but I’m annoyed, but also thankful that all mine were indoors and accountable for when it happened… So I don’t have the hot potato of grilling mine as to who threw that? As that would have further annoyed me, as they have a wonderful way of arguing and falling out amongst themselves pretty much most of the time… until they decide to stand together and then they can pull off an impressive wall of silence and plead ignorance even if they’ve been seen doing something… Their logic being that they have me outnumbered and if they stick together, then I’ll have to believe what they say… LOL little loves!

But I digress… I often do! So… speaking to the Cosmos…

I guess it has a sense of humour!

They often say that the devil is in the detail…

Late 90’s I went back to college full time for 2 years to retrain in Holistic Therapies and we were given several business assignments. The final one set was to put together your business plan… Now this covered every tiny detail imaginable from H&S and other legal requirements, marketing and strategy, branding… you name it, it was in there… I had an enormous box file, 4 inches deep filled with every detail imaginable right down to colour of paint for the skirting boards and details from estate agents for properties I was looking at…

The one and only time in lifeย that I have ever been fully organised and focused on planning what I’ll be doing…

Until that point, I’d merrily gone through life bouncing from one good idea to another…

Now I was ORGANISED!!! I had a VISION!!!

What could go wrong?

HA!!!

The shortest is answer would be to say… what didn’t go wrong…

Life threw the biggest shit storm at me that I never even imagined possible… A relentless torrent of too many things to go into and to be honest…even if I wanted to… I just don’t have the time and energy as even to this day, that period of maybe 3-4 years had so many things happen that I cannot still fully sequence them into order… and I feel exhausted to even think about it and I’m only really just very recently beginning to feel as though I’m getting my breath back… But the whole episode I sum up with…

If you want to make God laugh… Tell him your 5 year plan…

Now lets whizz forwards from there to 2 years ago when I took another business course…

Write down your business targets, you can’t achieve goals unless you have them there to see…

I thought long and hard and I had a vague feel sense of what I wanted but within that, thereย was a lot of room for me to go off road and learn things I didn’t know yet… I knew that what I’d end up doing was something I’d not yet discovered… So I wrote down…

To be in flow…

Now the lecturer went round the room and asked each person to read out their goals…

Good! Brilliant! Wonderful!

Karen?

To be in flow…

That’s not a GOAL…

Yes it is…

NO! That’s FUZZY!!! ย Goals have to be S.M.A.R.T.

(I forget what S.M.A.R.T. means now as I thought it pretty dumb as I pondered on the M and thought…. How do you make happiness measurable… I’d like 3 yards of happiness please…)

Oh.. O.K. then… my S.M.A.R.T. goal is…

TO TAKE TEN YEARS TO BECOME AN OVERNIGHT SUCCESS!!!

NEXT!!!

I clown around a lot… and that was dismissed as me clowning…

But… I know in myself exactly what that means… and I’m bang on track!

I don’t like to use words to lay out what I want… There’s a big part of me that thinks – a spell spoken is a spell broken…

I have a very clear image in my head of a scene in the future where I’ve achieved everything I set out to… I can see who I’m with and where I am and also how it feels…

I use this image to steer where I’m going… If I can see it in my mind’s eye then I know I’m on track…

Sometimes the image vanishes…

When it does then I have a game I play called news feed I-Ching…

I sit quietly and breathe and when the moment feels exactly right then I pick up my phone and flip to either facebook or twitter and I say to myself…

Bring me what I need to learn!

Then I respond to the first item that appears…

I’ve met some pretty awesome people that way… I’ve also met some massive arseholes!!! ๐Ÿ˜€ But they’ve all brought me what I needed to learn ๐Ÿ˜€

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10 thoughts on “Be careful what you wish for…

  1. Brilliant! Your approach bears a lot of similarities to my own. Just love ‘3 yards of happiness.’ It still feels irresponsible to go about things the way that I do, but I am beginning to accept that it’s the only way that is safe, nurturing and supportive to me. Thank you for sharing your journey!

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  2. Yes! I’ve just been reading yours and smiling to myself! I guess at times it can feel irresponsible but that’s a monkey mind trickster… Choosing the way you choose and accepting the consequences seems pretty responsible to me… Thanks for sharing your journey also ๐Ÿ™‚

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    1. Lol I’m glad of that storm! Sure it threw some crap at me but nothing that I didn’t find a way of handling and also it also washed away a lot of crap that had been slowly building and needed clearing… Yes… the Universe does indeed have a sense of humour and fortunately it also gifted me with one to match ๐Ÿ˜€

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  3. I’ll have 9 pots of happiness please! I love that game you play of asking the universe to bring you what you need to learn…very brave! it’s not always something we think we need or even want. Brilliant idea though, and one I shall be trying out myself. I don’t enjoy spending cash on maintenance for the house…I’d rather be buying important things like chocolate, but I guess I wouldn’t be enjoying the look of plywood or wind whistling through for very long either…

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  4. Luckily no wind whistling through as it’s double glazed and the other pane is intact! Chocolate is usually high on my list of priorities also! ๐Ÿ˜€ It is a fun game and I’m not so sure it’s brave but rather fool hardy! Every so often I get a reading from a friend and they’ll say – What’s your question… I reply – Hit me with your best shot! Now that is fun but definitely not for the faint hearted ๐Ÿ˜€

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